20 Deep Topics to Talk About with Your Crush + Questions
When you're getting to know your crush, getting to know them on a deeper level is important for many reasons. That's why we have brought together this article on 20 deep topics to talk about with your crush, with deep questions to ask your crush to get to know them better.
Connecting on a deeper level is tricky; you don't want to come across as a weirdo or ask a question that scares them off.
Many other articles suggest that asking basic questions about their favourite movie, a favourite song, or favourite tv shows. But, unfortunately, the basic "flirty questions to ask your crush" just won't do it.
Things have gotten even harder with texting now being a big part of dating in 2022.
Continue reading below to find the best deep topics and questions to ask your crush, and get in touch if you think we've missed anything.
Intro: The Basics of Talking to Your Crush
Talking to your crush can be a daunting task. Of course, you want to make them feel comfortable and get them to open up to you. But you also want them to like you back. One way of doing this is by asking deep questions that show that you are interested in who they are and what they do.
Questions like: "What's your favourite movie?" or "What are your hobbies?" are not deep questions because they don't require much thought or insight from the other person.
Think about it, if someone was going to get to know you, would those questions get below the surface? No. So you have to think harder about how to ask the right questions.
These questions can be answered quickly, and then the conversation will end. Deep questions, on the other hand, require more thought from both parties and give more insight into who someone is as a person.
You will not have any problems if you're always respectful and honest. But, that being said, having a helping hand always helps. This is why we've brought together 20 deep topics to talk about with your crush.
How to have a Deep Conversation with your crush
Having deep conversations and getting to know each other on a deeper level is essential in many ways. For example, getting this right could lead to sparks and great conversation starters, whether you're looking for something serious or casual.
This section gives you the answer to" how can I talk deep to my crush?"
The first step to having a deep conversation with your crush is ensuring you are both on the same page. You want to ensure they are interested in discussing the same topics as you. If they aren't, it will be difficult for you to have a deep conversation with them.
This is basically a compatibility test. Things will likely break down if you aren't compatible or don't have the same values. We have already discussed this on our blog covering talking to a girl over text.
Next, you should take some time and think about what topics you would like to talk about with your crush. These topics must be things that interest you and your crush as well. If they don't have any ideas, then it's best if they come up with some topics before the conversation starts so there is something for both of them to talk about.
Make sure you define your boundaries of the things you SHOULDN'T talk about - for example, everyone has exes. This topic can be deep, but that doesn't mean you should bring it up, particularly when you're getting to know each other.
Lastly, it's important not to push too hard during this conversation. It might leave the other person may feel like you are trying too hard, which will be uncomfortable for both of you. If it feels awkward, take a break from the conversation to give yourself some time to cool off.
Think of it the other way around, would you be comfortable if your crush asked you a deep question that you didn't like and kept digging? The trick to discussing deep topics with your crush is knowing what NOT to talk about.
Research has found that only 17% of online daters ended up in a relationship after meeting them online. So, knowing how to get to know your crush on a deeper level is crucial in those early stages.
10 Deep Topics to Talk About with your Crush over Text
Finding the perfect topic to talk about with your crush over text can be tricky. As discussed above, picking topics to NOT talk about is just as important as knowing what to talk about. No one wants 21 questions as this could be a deal-breaker.
To help with this, here are 10 deep topics that you can talk about with your crush over text or in person:
Your favourite memory together - This is a great topic to discuss as it makes you reflect on the time you spent together. This may not be applicable if you have never met, but you can discuss what you would like to do together instead.
Your favourite things to eat - Everyone loves food. We at A Couples Things To Do know this more than anyone after trying Michelin Star restaurants, so talking about this is a surefire topic. To turn this topic deep, discuss the food you couldn't live without and why.
What you both want from dating - Everyone wants slightly different things when it comes to dating. Whether it be a fling or a long-term relationship, discussing this topic can lead to deep conversations while also setting you up for success.
Things you couldn't live without - As discussed above with food, discussing things you can't live without and why is a great deep topic to talk about with your crush.
Your biggest regrets - While every mistake leads you to where you are today, we all inevitably have regrets. Discussing this deep topic with your crush is a great way to get to know each other while learning about yourself.
We like to talk about this deep topic as we can change how we act in the future, meaning we won't make those mistakes again!Trends you both can't get behind - There will always be boom and busts - topics and themes go in and out of fashion for no reason (ake X below). Discussing these and why you can't get behind them is a great deep topic as it can allow you to see each other's beliefs.
Your upbringing - As discussed here by Business Insider, things such as your IQ, parents' socioeconomic status, your education, rule-breaking and defiance of parental authority all have a significant impact on how you are as an adult. This is one of the best deep topics to talk about with your crush over text and in person, as you can shine the light on why you are how you are.
Your biggest fears - Discussing what you are scared of is a great deep topic. Henry and Robyn both have forms of social anxiety, the most common form of phobia, in different situations. This really helped us become more aware of each other.
Things that blow your mind - Life on other planets, Boris' mad behaviour, how many people are in credit card debt. These are all things that blow our minds, and we love to talk about them.
How the world will change in the next 10 years - Getting each others' perspectives on how the world will change is one of our favourite deep topics to talk about with your crush. It forces you to look at societal trends and project how they will impact our lives.
10 Deep Questions to Ask Your Crush
You're having a conversation with your crush, but you don't know what to ask them to get to know them on a deeper level.
You don't want to be weird, put them off or go too deep, so you need help with deep questions to ask your crush. Below we have added 10 deep questions to ask your crush to answer; what are some deep questions to ask?
Who Knows You The Best? - Everyone has that friend or family member who knows you better than anyone else. Discussing this and the memories you have had together will shine the light on that special person in their life. In addition, you will get to know the information you never knew about your crush.
What would be the first thing you'd do if you won the lottery? Put money into the mix and see what happens… One of the best deep questions to ask your crush is how they'd act if they got loads of cash; do they value their family, friends, or personal life more?
What achievement are you most proud of and why? As with the above, one of the benefits of deep questions is that they show the true motivations of someone. Learning more about people's highest value achievements is a great way to see what someone values and what they will look to achieve in the future.
We're big believers that a relationship should be something where you grow together and support each other. So if you want your crush to turn into a long-term relationship, learning how you can help them achieve their goals is a surefire way to build for success.What's your biggest ick? An ick is an instant turnoff in someone. Asking each other your icks is a great deep question to ask your crush as you can learn what you SHOULDN'T do when you go on a date. One of our biggest icks is rudeness - if your crush has this ick too, then you know that this is something they value highly, which is great!
What are you over and done with? - This question is good for when you have a crush on someone who seems too much to handle, and you need to know what they're not going to put up with. If someone is done with something you frequently do, then you know that it either isn't going to work, or you need to change how you act!
Is it ever okay to lie? If so, when? - This is a profound question to ask your crush as it can allow you to suss them out and identify whether they're someone you should get to know more. Of course, some people have different lines here. For us, integrity is so so so important, meaning we don't think it's okay to lie. In fact, it's better to be honest so you can both work towards solving problems!
What do you want your three closest friends/family to say about you at your funeral? We spoke about this on our second date. It was a great topic to discuss as it highlighted our desires and got a bit emotional. Of course, you never want to talk about death if someone is sensitive, but the best deep questions to ask your crush aren't necessarily for the faint-hearted!
What's something most people learn after it's too late? Deep questions don't get much deeper than this. We've all made mistakes, and we've all learnt a lot throughout our lives. Does anyone else have parents that used to say, "if I knew what I know now"? This topic will cover those things and get you to know each other on a deeper level.
What does your perfect day look like? We all have a perfect day. Talking about this will shine a lot about a person as they will speak about who they see themselves spending time with, where they see themselves going and what truly matters to someone. Furthermore, if someone says they see themselves single and you want a relationship, at least you know early on!
What do you want in a relationship? The ultimate deep question to ask your crush. If you're looking for something long-term, this will answer whether they want that too and also provide a deep topic to talk about which covers your future.
Conclusion: Deep Topics to Talk About with Your Crush + Questions
Above, we have provided 10 deep questions to ask your crush and 10 topics to talk about with your crush based on our experience and research. No doubt we have missed many points off this blog, but feel free to reach out if you have anything to add.
One of the most important takeaways is that you need to be yourself. Having deep conversations is great and will tell you a lot about your crush. But, you will start off on the wrong foot if you're not honest and genuine.
Yes, there are some landmines you need to tread around in deep topics. Still, the only way you will successfully navigate them in the future is by testing the waters. It all starts with a conversation, whether it's just a fling or something more profound.